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Jokes

11 Nov 25

Here’s a massive, fresh batch of 100+ clean, hilarious jokes - perfect for late-night laughs in India! Categories include Delhi Blast, Bihar Elections, Pollution, Travel, Tech, Freelancer, Dad Jokes, News-Inspired, and more. Let’s go! 😄

Delhi Blast Jokes (Dark Humor Warning)

  1. Why did the car near Red Fort explode? It heard the prices at Chandni Chowk and blew up in rage.
  2. What did the NIA say to the Hyundai i20? “You’ve got some explosive history!”
  3. Why was the blast so loud? It wanted to wake up the government.
  4. What’s the new Red Fort rule? No parking… unless you’re disarming.
  5. Why did the bomber fail the exam? He couldn’t handle the pressure.

Bihar Elections Phase 2 Jokes

  1. Why did Tejashwi Yadav bring a calculator to the poll? To count on NDA’s mistakes.
  2. What’s a Bihar voter’s favorite ID? Aadhaar — because even the EC trusts it more than voter cards!
  3. Why don’t Bihar politicians play chess? Too many checkmates in real life.
  4. What did the EVM say after 67% turnout? “I’m charged up!”
  5. Why is Bihar voting so slow? Everyone’s waiting for exit poll tea.

Delhi-NCR Pollution Jokes

  1. Why is Delhi’s AQI single? It’s too toxic for a relationship.
  2. What did Bawana say to Rohini? “You breathe, I’ll choke.”
  3. Why don’t Delhiites play hide and seek? Good luck hiding in smog.
  4. What’s Delhi’s new perfume? Eau de Severe+.
  5. Why did the mask go to therapy? It couldn’t filter its emotions.

Travel & Airline Jokes (ASAP Tickets Special)

  1. Why don’t ASAP Tickets agents use real names? Because trust is just a markup.
  2. What’s ASAP Tickets’ favorite exercise? Adding margins.
  3. Why did the passenger book with ASAP? He fell for the paid insurance trap—now he’s broke and still uninsured.
  4. What’s the difference between ASAP Tickets and a scam? One has a US address, the other doesn’t pretend.
  5. Why don’t airlines trust ASAP? They know direct booking is cheaper.
  6. What did the fare lock say? “I’m stuck at this price… forever.”
  7. Why did the consultant cry? The client booked directly with the airline.
  8. What’s ASAP’s motto? “We’re not in the US, but we’ll sound like it!”
  9. Why don’t ASAP agents play poker? They can’t hide their markup face.
  10. What’s the safest way to fly? Avoid middlemen—book direct!

Tech Jokes (Late-Night Coder Edition)

  1. Why did the programmer stay up till 10:14 PM? Debugging life.exe.
  2. What’s a coder’s bedtime story? “Once upon a null…”
  3. Why don’t bugs sleep? They’re wide awake in production.
  4. What did the API say at 10 PM? “Rate limit yourself!”
  5. Why is JavaScript single? It can’t commit.
  6. How do you comfort a tired developer? “Just push it to tomorrow.”
  7. Why did the laptop go to bed? It was overclocked.
  8. What’s a hacker’s favorite snack? Cookies (and your data).
  9. Why don’t databases sleep? They’re always on call.
  10. What did Python say to Java? “I’m indented to you.”

Freelancer Jokes (10:14 PM Hustle)

  1. Why do freelancers work at night? The sun charges too much.
  2. What’s a freelancer’s alarm clock? Client email at 2 AM.
  3. Why did the freelancer bring coffee to bed? To brew ideas.
  4. What’s a freelancer’s favorite key? Esc — from deadlines.
  5. Why don’t clients pay on time? They’re on freelancer standard time.
  6. What did the invoice say at 10:14 PM? “Still pending…”
  7. Why do freelancers love dark mode? It matches their soul.
  8. What’s a freelancer’s diet? Ramen and revisions.
  9. Why did the freelancer stare at the moon? It was the only thing not revising.
  10. How do freelancers celebrate? One paid invoice = one pizza.

Dad Jokes (Classic Groaners)

  1. I told my wife the air in Delhi is bad. She said, “Then open a window!”
  2. Why don’t eggs vote in Bihar? They’re afraid of getting scrambled.
  3. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta — like fake US addresses.
  4. Why don’t skeletons book flights? No guts.
  5. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. Can’t put it down — unlike Delhi’s AQI.
  6. What do you call a sleepy dinosaur? A stega-snore-us.
  7. Why don’t calendars date? They have too many commitments.
  8. What’s a foot’s favorite chip? Corn on the cob.
  9. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Outstanding in his field — unlike some politicians.
  10. I used to hate facial hair… but then it grew on me.

News-Inspired Jokes (Nov 11, 2025)

  1. Why did the U.S. shutdown end? It finally funded a therapist.
  2. What did the Senate say after passing the bill? “We’re back online!”
  3. Why is Pakistan’s bomber in court? He wanted a fair trial… with explosives.
  4. What’s Typhoon Fung-wong’s travel tip? “Pack light — I’ll blow everything away.”
  5. Why did the ghee go to Tirupati? To get purified… too late.
  6. What did the Supreme Court say to EC? “Your revision is suspect.”
  7. Why is J&K police so busy? 2,900 kg of IEDs = heavy workload.
  8. What’s Elena Rybakina’s bank account saying? “$5.2M served.”
  9. Why did India lose Hong Kong Sixes? Too many dot balls — like voter turnout.
  10. What did Wankhede say to T20 World Cup? “I’ll host the final boss.”

Random & Silly Jokes

  1. Why don’t ghosts use WhatsApp? Too many transparent chats.
  2. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
  3. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing — and the AQI.
  4. How do you catch a squirrel? Act like a nut — works on clients too.
  5. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
  6. Why don’t oysters share? They’re shellfish.
  7. What do you call a sleepwalking nun? A roamin’ Catholic.
  8. Why did the bicycle fall? It was two-tired from pollution.
  9. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
  10. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? They make up everything — like travel agents.

Late-Night One-Liners (10:14 PM Special)

  1. I’m not lazy — I’m on energy-saving mode.
  2. My bed is a magical place where I remember everything I forgot to invoice.
  3. I told my Wi-Fi we needed space. Now it’s offline.
  4. Sleep is just a time machine to tomorrow’s deadlines.
  5. I don’t snore — I dream I’m a motorcycle.

Bonus: Indian Local Flavor

  1. Why is Shillong so cool? It’s got cloud Wi-Fi.
  2. What did Darjeeling tea say to coffee? “You’re just bitter.”
  3. Why don’t Khasi hills gossip? They’re too elevated.
  4. What’s Siliguri’s favorite fruit? Pineapple — always spiky in traffic.
  5. Why did the ginger go to Meghalaya? To get fresh air — oops, wrong state.

Final 15 (For the Night Owls)

  1. I asked the moon for money. It said, “Lunar credit only.”
  2. Why don’t clocks work in space? No gravity to tick.
  3. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A blood orange.
  4. Why did the smartphone meditate? To find inner peace (and battery).
  5. What do you call a magician on a plane? A flying sorcerer.
  6. Why don’t melons elope? They cantaloupe.
  7. What did one wall say to the other? “Meet you at the corner.”
  8. Why did the music teacher go to jail? Too many sharp objects.
  9. What’s a computer’s favorite dance? The algo-rhythm.
  10. Why don’t crabs donate? They’re shellfish.
  11. I told my wife she was overreacting. She just exploded — like a car in Delhi.
  12. What’s a freelancer’s spirit animal? Owl — works all night.
  13. Why did the lightbulb fail? It wasn’t bright enough for 10:14 PM.
  14. What do you call an honest travel agent? Unemployed.
  15. Last one: I’m not asleep… I’m just buffering.