Jokes

Here’s a fresh batch of jokes just for you! 😄

1. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
2. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
3. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
4. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
5. Why don’t programmers like nature? It has too many bugs.
6. My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, I had to take his bike away.
7. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
8. I asked the librarian if they had books on paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you…”
9. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
10. I told my computer I needed a break… Now it won’t stop sending me KitKat ads.
11. Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
12. I used to play piano by ear… But now I use my hands.
13. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
14. Why don’t crabs give to charity? Because they’re shellfish too.
15. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
16. Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
17. I wanted to be a doctor, but I didn’t have the patients.
18. Why don’t calendars ever get tired? They have lots of dates.
19. My boss told me to have a good day… So I went home.
20. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!